Entries tagged as ‘O.J. Mayo’
Bruce Bowen is thinking "Can I get away with biting into his neck?"
Houston Rockets: Any real basketball fan hopes that this is the season T-Mac shakes the monkey and gets his team through the first round of the playoffs. T-Mac, Yao and Artest with a great supporting cast: it should be a return to Houston’s former glory of only about a decade ago.
It’s just so sad though. We know what’s going to happen, and it crushes our collective heart. T-Mac will break down. Yao will once again be defeated by the laws of physics and crush his fragile feet. Maybe they can hit say, 40 wins, bench these two for the rest of the regular season, and hope the role players can wrangle the next 10 or so wins that gets them 8th spot in the West. If Houston can stay healthy, the toughest division in the league just got even tougher.
Hang on, no. Because that would mean Ron Artest becomes the de facto team leader, which is questionable for two reasons: one, he’d have to not be suspended, which is only ever a 50% chance with the Don; and two, even if he isn’t suspended, do you let Ron Artest give advice to your younger players?
San Antonio Spurs: Who cares? The team is basically unchanged, so my prediction remains unchanged — they will challenge for the conference final, in yet another victory for stupidly boring basketball and bad sportsmanship.
Bar Spurs fans, is there anyone out there who doesn’t hope the entire team gets brought up on charges of bringing the game into disrepute and booted to the D-league? Is there a less enjoyable team to watch (okay, maybe Detroit)? Is there a less likable group of players, even given the fact they’ve ditched Horry? Is there anyone who doesn’t hope Bruce Bowen hard fouls Ron Artest and gets repaid with a straight shot to the chin like Ron-Ron landed on that Turtle-looking-fella at Auburn Hills?
Memphis Grizzlies: How could you dislike the Grizz this season? They’re basically a bunch of young kids who were playing pick-up and sent a letter to David Stern saying “mind if we have a crack at the NBA?”
O.J. Mayo proved in the preseason that he’s not daunted by playing in the NBA. Rudy Gay is one of the most electrifying, and dominant, young talents in the league. This alone should make the team likable. But then they’ve got an upside-laden young point guard in Conley, who will be amazing if he ever stops gaming, the brother of a proud racist and a centre with genuine hustle in Marc Gasol, and rookie power forward Darrell Arthur, who slipped too far in the draft due to concerns about a heart condition. Someone will one day make a movie about the 2008-2009 Grizzlies, who will only just scrape over twenty wins, but through the adversity will learn the true meaning of friendship.
Dallas Mavericks: Let’s not skirt around the issue. Dallas are too old now. They’re just too old. Their time has passed, and they’re irrelevant. You can imagine them all standing around when electricity was invented going “pfft — nothing will ever replace the good old steam engine.”
Jerry Stackhouse, Jason Kidd, Jason Terry, Eric Dampier, and Devean George are all ancient. Even if they’re still functional, they’ll get injured, or will spend too much time thinking about how they’re going to spend their millions when they retire in the next two years.
Moreover, how much confidence would you have in the coming years? Your GM has just traded a potential All-Star point guard (Devin Harris) away for a wife-beating grey hair (Jason Kidd), and then signed DeSagana Diop to almost $30M worth of contract. WTF. Did Cuban green-light that contract based on how many blocks Diop gets in fantasy leagues? It’s all just bad news at Dallas.
New Orleans Hornets: Unbelievably, everyone’s second favourite team managed to only get better over the off-season with the signing of ring-magnet James Posey. Adding his long range threat and clutch abilities to the talents of Chris Paul, David West, Tyson Chandler and Peja Stojakovic makes the Hornets the team to beat in the West. Yes, better than the Lakers.
Posted by: Alex
Categories: On The Court · Sport Count Guide
Tagged: Bruce Bowen, Chris Paul, Dallas Mavericks, Darrell Arthur, David Stern, David West, Desagana Diop, Devean George, Devin Harris, Entourage, Eric Dampier, Houston Rockets, James Posey, Jason Kidd, Jerry Stackhouse, Los Angeles Lakers, Marc Gasol, Mark Cuban, Memphis Grizzlies, Mike Conley, New Orleans Hornets, O.J. Mayo, Peja Stojakovic, Ron Artest, Rudy Gay, San Antonio Spurs, Tracy McGrady, Tyson Chandler, Yao Ming
'Melo swore to me that Denver will definitely go over .500 this season...'
The division that makes up roughly half of the continental United States looks to have some exciting stories this season, with the inaugural season for Oklahoma, the Oden Explosion in Oregon and the traveling comedy that will be Kevin Love’s away games. There’s also last year’s playoff contenders in Denver and Utah, both looking to repeat .500+ records in the tough Western Conference.
Denver Nuggets: After unceremoniously dropping Camby to the Clippers for $4.72 in change and two cans of Tecate, GM Mark Warkentien went ahead and picked up Chris Andersen to fill the huge, inescapable void that Camby’s absence will leave in the Nuggets’ defence. Obviously, Mark Warkentien doesn’t play fantasy basketball, or he’d realise the mistake he made. In fact, it’s a move that suggests Mark Warkentien doesn’t even watch basketball.
This error will be compounded during the All-Star break when the reformed Andersen injures both himself and ‘Melo trying to stop the Chubby Gangster from having a second bump at the wheel of his Escalade, while The Answer sits in the back saying ‘that’s nothing, I did shit ten times worse than that. Do it.’ Cue the police arriving and Denver having to start Linas Kleiza and Sonny Weems for the rest of the season.
Portland Trailblazers: Is anyone not excited about the Blazers this season? Brandon Roy, LaMarcus Aldridge, Jerryd Bayless and Greg Oden. The Blazers’ front office have got to be hoping this year or next year is a ring year, because that is a whole lot of massive contracts they’re going to have to offer soon. The highlight of the season will be when Oden throws down a dunk so monstrous he lowers the entire Pacific shelf 9-feet, and half of Los Angeles disappears into the ocean.
Oklahoma City Thunder: The first game is a sell-out as every season ticket-holder shows up. The Ford Center retains this adrenaline-fuelled atmosphere, with Oklahoma creating a few early upset wins. Then Kevin Durant pulls a hammy, and everyone realises they don’t know the names of the rest of the team, save 23 frat boys who turn up to yell ‘hey, Castro Supreme!’ at Chris Wilcox and high-five each other.
David Stern receives a note from the entire population of Seattle saying ‘Dear David, do you see what you’ve done? You shit.’
Utah Jazz: Let’s look at this objectively. They’ve got two gold medallists in Deron Williams and Carlos Boozer, supported by Mehmet Okur and former All-Star Andrei Kirilenko, with some exciting upside in Ronnie Brewer and Paul Millsap. Even Kyle Korver is good for something. And they’re being coached by Jerry Sloan. If they don’t push deep into the playoffs, the entire franchise should be dropped to the D-League.
Minnesota Timberwolves: Now that everyone has worked out that Al Jefferson is All-Star material, and teams have begun collapsing on him, there will be pressure on the rookie Kevin Love to pick up some of the slack. Unfortunately, he won’t, and Minnesota fans will divide their time between bitterly tracking O.J. Mayo’s exciting rookie season, and betting on the spread Vegas is offering on Kevin Love’s foul-to-points ratio.
Posted by: Alex
Read the Atlantic Division preview here.
Categories: On The Court · Sport Count Guide
Tagged: Al Jefferson, Allen Iverson, Andrei Kirilenko, Brandon Roy, Carlos Boozer, Carmelo Anthony, Castro Supreme, Chris Anderson, Chris Wilcox, David Stern, Denver Nuggets, Deron Williams, Greg Oden, Jerry Sloan, Jerryd Bayless, Kevin Durant, Kevin Love, Kyle Korver, LaMarcus Aldridge, Linus Kleiza, Mark Warkentien, Mehmet Okur, Minnesota Timberwolves, O.J. Mayo, Oklahoma City Thunder, Paul Millsap, Portland Trailblazers, Ronnie Brewer, Sonny Weems, Utah Jazz
"I received this letter from The Sport Count at 10:03 this morning..."
Dear David,
We write in regards to the rumours currently doing the rounds of teh internetz which suggest Memphis will be trading famous Eurobust and bench stain Darko Milicic to New York. We understand that in return, the Grizzlies will receive Zach Randolph and his bowel-moving contract.
As fans of the game of basketball, and particularly the NBA, we urge you in the strongest possible terms to veto this trade. Do not let it happen. For the good of the game, prohibit these teams from dealing dirty laundry in such a public manner.
It is not that we feel the trade is unfair in any way. Nor do we feel there is unsportsmanlike behaviour occurring. The reality is far more horrible. Allowing this trade to go through will represent the single worst example of the game being brought into disrepute. It is the NBA equivalent of a man swapping his sewerage to a neighbour for a bucket of the other man’s sick — neither party can be trusted or respected following the transaction.
Think of the fans, David. Think of the many people who, having followed each franchise with sincerity and passion, will have to find a new team.
Think about the New Yorkers, whose once-proud team has the opportunity to rebuild under Mike D’Antoni, but is now seemingly prepared to take on the biggest joke in the league, and his terrible contract, rather than a sporadically-functioning big man.
Think about the Memphis fans who have thrown their support behind perennial journeyers the Grizzlies. Finally their faith has been rewarded, with an exciting young team in Gay, Mayo, Arthur and Conley, now only to be saddled with a man who takes 14 seconds to transition the court, and has no conception of defence.
It is unjust, David. It is wrong. The fans’ stomachs cannot handle this. We have had to endure Seattle being stripped of their team, Adam Morrison’s face, almost 5 years of Isiah Thomas, and the Bargnani pick. Don’t make us go through this. If you have any compassion left behind that ruthless business acumen, heed our cry, and prevent this trade from happening.
Sincerely,
Yours,
The Sport Count.
Posted by: Alex
Categories: Desperate Pleas · NBA Mysteries · Off The Court · Trade Talk · Whitey Watch
Tagged: Adam Morrison, Memphis Grizzlies, David Stern, Darko Milicic, New York Knicks, Seattle Supersonics, O.J. Mayo, Andrea Bargnani, Mike Conley, Rudy Fernandez, Rudy Gay, Isiah Thomas, Zach Randolph
Cuban totally gets Europe.
That whole ‘bloggers out of the locker room‘ thing was clearly ridiculous, but Mark Cuban is capable of absolutely nailing it when it comes to the business of sport. Right now, Europe looks more enemy (’no LeBron in the NBA? What?! I’ll kill you mothe –’) than friend, but Cuban can see the bigger picture*:
Let’s say for the sake of example a couple players got 25mm, 50mm or whatever a year pay and they play on teams that just dominate. They rip apart every team they face. What happens next? People wonder who the best teams in the world are. When that discussion becomes serious, the NBA and those winning overseas teams get paid. European Soccer has done a phenomenal job of inventing tournaments that drive huge revenues and TV dollars.
This would allow the NBA to do the same thing. Take a Christmas break, or do it in the summer, where the top 6 records in the league play the top 6 teams over there, with the revenues from the event being split primarily among the participant teams rather than equally among all NBA teams. Not only would that be a great revenue source for all the teams involved, but it would create a huge economic incentive for the other 24NBA teams and all overseas team to become top tier teams.
Then of course we could create our own World Cup type tournament every 4 years. ALL of this could open the door to create more NBA owned competition. I’m not saying it would be easy or automatic. Quite a few parties that dont always see eye to eye would have to come to agreement, But the timing for all of that is right and its an amazing opportunity for players, leagues and teams alike.
You can see that panning out, right? It’s totally possible. And if more quality basketball tournaments around the world could potentially lead to less bloody Euro soccer (not football) on ESPN Asia (’That’s Smyth with a ‘Y’? I get it!!‘), I’m all for it.
The Hawks re-signed Josh Smith: It was always going to happen. For all his odd mistakes and occasionally unfocused play, Smith fits in perfectly at the young Hawks (Horford and Smith after a year playing together? That’s a good frontcourt). Atlanta did well on the financial front by letting the free agency bear market set the price. I’m just a little bummed that the Grizzlies couldn’t get him; imagine Conley, Mayo, Gay, Josh Smith, and Hakim Warrick as a smallball starting line-up. I’d lose hundreds betting on Memphis wins that never come, just because I’d love watching them play.
I’m a fan of the Sports Illustrated vaults: 1997, before the rings came, and a young rookie from the Virgin Islands met the Admiral, and they discussed Einstein’s theory of relativity. One year earlier and Utah’s pick-and-roll show is having troubles against the young Reign Man and his sidekick, The Glove.
Quick reads: Kwame Brown on his move to the Pistons: ‘You don’t know me! Shuuut up! You don’t know me! You don’t know me!!’ … I hope you saw Andrei Kirilenko at the Olympic opening ceremony, because he was dressed like an inmate in a criminal rehabilitation centre owned and operated by Willy Wonka. Here he is on Ball Don’t Lie … It’s not that new, but the latest Funston Big Board is worth a read. Also, I really like saying ‘Funston Big Board.’
Posted By: Anton
*Homes, trust he done seen it, from Frankfurt to Cologne, Oslo to Sweden.
Categories: The Reading List
Tagged: Detroit Pistons, Memphis Grizzlies, Kwame Brown, Atlanta Hawks, LeBron James, O.J. Mayo, Josh Smith, Mike Conley, Rudy Gay, Mark Cuban, Hakim Warrick, Andrei Kirilenko, Clipse
There’s a lot of trickery in the NBA.
We’re talking guys with mad handles, crowds being distracting, Globetrotter-esque passing, the works. But there’s one talent available to only a select few players, those naturally gifted in a certain way; the ability to trick people with your looks. Specifically, looking eons older or younger than you actually are. The Sport Count brings you, in no particular order, its top five Age Trickers.
1. LeBron James | Cleveland Cavaliers | The man is now, allegedly, not quite 24 years old. Arguably the best player in the NBA, LeBron also tricks you by looking like a wizened old sage and, while this confuses you, he throws down monster dunks all over the shop.
Actual Age: 23
Tricking Age: 42
2. Jason Maxiell | Detroit Pistons
Maxiell was drafted in 2005. His trickery is so good though, that he looks like your Dad’s best friend. While you’re thinking about all the fun times he and your Dad had after school, he’s displaying his not inconsiderable upside by hauling in caroms and stuffing it.
Actual Age: 25
Tricking Age: 55
3. Chris Quinn | Miami Heat
Chris Quinn fooled the system. Everyone thinks he’s a college-educated kid who can play competent point guard. He’s not. He’s actually an elf, and finds it uncomfortable to be holding a basketball and not a longbow. So really, he’s doing okay.
Actual Age: 24
Tricking Age: 11
Elf Age: 700
4. Greg Oden | Portland Trailblazers
I don’t even have to explain this. The only thing worth mentioning here is that he has an incredible vertical leap for a 68 year old man.
Actual Age: 20
Tricking Age: 68
5. OJ Mayo | Memphis Grizzlies
OJ is in fact not a child basketball prodigy. If you look at him, you can tell he’s actually a successful San Francisco lawyer. Or that’s what his tricking talent suggests, before he totally runs the floor and you’re left standing there going “Huh? Nailing a triple? I thought he was about to serve me with an affadevit.”
Actual Age: 21
Tricking Age: 32
Posted by: Alex
Categories: NBA Mysteries · Sport Count Guide
Tagged: Miami Heat, Memphis Grizzlies, Cleveland Cavaliers, LeBron James, O.J. Mayo, Portland Trailblazers, Greg Oden, Chris Quinn, Jason Maxiell
